Why You Should Thank Every Asshole in Your Life + The Million Dollar Question That Reveals Your Money Blocks with Danielle McKinley
When Your Money Story is Secretly Running Your Business
Have you ever wondered why you seem to hit the same income ceiling year after year? Or why looking at your financial statements makes you want to hide under a blanket? The answer might be buried in a story you've been telling yourself about money since childhood.
I recently sat down with business mentor Danielle McKinley, and within minutes of our conversation, she called out my money story with laser precision. “Your story is that you're worried the 2008 bankruptcy will keep happening,” she said. She wasn't wrong.
The Power of Childhood Money Stories
Danielle's entrepreneurial journey began with a moment that would break most people. At just 8 years old, she asked her mother to leave her alcoholic father. Her mother's response? “I would if I could, but I can't afford to care for you kids on my own.”
That night, staring at her bedroom ceiling, Danielle made a promise that would shape her entire life: money would never dictate her choices again.
Fast forward decades later, and Danielle has built and sold a software company, mentors entrepreneurs on money mindset, and has developed an intuitive gift for identifying limiting money stories within minutes of meeting someone.
The 90-Second Rule for Emotional Mastery
One of the most powerful tools Danielle shared is the 90-second rule. Emotions are just 6-second combustions in your brain, followed by 90 seconds of feeling. If you can sit with that discomfort for 90 seconds without adding fuel to the fire with negative thoughts, you can prevent the downward spiral that keeps so many entrepreneurs stuck.
“The downward spiral – those negative thoughts that start popping in – that's like putting fuel on a fire,” Danielle explains. This simple awareness can transform how you handle setbacks, rejection, and financial stress in your business.
Rewriting Your Financial Story
So how do you identify and change your money story? Start with this powerful question: “If a million dollars hit my bank account tomorrow, would I be able to keep it and grow it, or would I lose it?”
Your gut reaction reveals everything. From there, Danielle recommends rewriting limiting beliefs into empowering affirmations. Instead of “more money, more problems,” try “more money, more opportunities.” Set it as a daily phone alarm and watch your subconscious mind begin to shift.
The “Thank Assholes” Philosophy
Perhaps the most provocative concept Danielle shared is her “Thank Assholes” theory. Those people who trigger you? They're actually your teachers, revealing strengths you didn't know you had and providing lessons in resilience.
“Triggers are our teachers,” she says. “We don't always know in the moment the lesson being taught, but there's always a lesson there.”
Your Money Story Starts Now
Whether you're avoiding your numbers, stuck at a certain income level, or feeling triggered by financial stress, remember this: your money story was written by an 8-year-old version of yourself who didn't have all the information. It's time to rewrite it.
The question isn't whether you have a money story – everyone does. The question is whether you're ready to transform it from a limitation into your greatest asset. Ready to dive deeper? Listen to the full episode where Danielle shares her complete SOTU Method for financial management and reveals how to turn your biggest challenges into your entrepreneurial superpowers.
xo, Tracy
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Links in this episode:
Follow @_lifebydanielle on Instagram!
Danielle’s podcast: Magic in the Mess
State of the Union Financial Check-In (SOTU Challenge)
The Desired Brand Effect Collective
The Jewelry Pricing Bundle + Calculator
Buy My Book: The Desired Brand Effect